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Below are the 17 most recent journal entries recorded in Real Ultimate Power's LiveJournal:

Thursday, August 11th, 2005
12:27 am
[hipgunslinger]
Taking a moment...

to be as ninja as possible.
Thursday, September 19th, 2002
3:06 am
[hipgunslinger]
I don't think I mentioned this, but I got my orange belt a couple of weeks ago.
I am severly beginning to wail more than anybody else I know.
to commemorate, a ninja haiku:

run from deadly hands
but away in the night, hear
wailing, coming close.

Current Mood: Ninjariffic
Sunday, August 4th, 2002
4:19 am
[nefariousjareth]


me in my ninja cardigan, totally rocking on the outside but crying inside about some heinous babe.



my weeping has attracted a bunch of emo kids with bad haircuts who believe i am truly one of them. here i am wailing on my guitar. off camera, a vespa is exploding from the pure destructive force of iron maiden. there's still a mangled black plastic lump on my wall that was once a pair of glasses.



here i'm about to kick my girlfriend right in the face. she's such an awesome babe for taking these pictures, totally awesome, and yet somehow sweet.
Wednesday, July 31st, 2002
2:01 am
[brokenappliance]
life as a ninja can be hard sometimes.

like when people start to get jealous of all the babes i get, i have to kick them in the face. but then i just get more.

it's a vicious cycle.

Current Mood: tough
Tuesday, May 21st, 2002
7:32 pm
[hipgunslinger]
A lot of people ask me...

A lot of people ask me... Johnny, why is it that when you're a ninja, you never wear all black. Doesn't that make you so much more detectable?
And I always tell them, friends... I'm just THAT good.
--
This is my staff, I pose in the first one, and in the second one, I'm just about to wake an unsuspecting, sleeping victim.
Buy your ninja alarm today.
Cost effective, reliable, and only one out of every ten accidentally chops your head off.
IT'S TOTALLY AWESOME!

Current Mood: In a staff whackin' mood.
Thursday, May 16th, 2002
1:22 am
[nefariousjareth]
emo ninja haiku
sometimes you love me
but then i can see myself
chopping off your head.

Current Mood: ninjy.
Monday, April 22nd, 2002
5:29 pm
[hipgunslinger]
I am so fucking ninja it's not even funny.
Even that shirt is totally sweet and awesome.


Current Mood: Pants-Crappingly Sweet
Saturday, April 20th, 2002
8:49 pm
[nefariousjareth]
i am seriously wailing here.
4:37 pm
[hipgunslinger]
Dear Everybody...
I got my yellow belt yesterday.
I'm on my way to some Harsh flipping out and chopping off head action.
Wednesday, April 17th, 2002
8:47 pm
[hipgunslinger]
Friday, March 22nd, 2002
10:20 pm
[hipgunslinger]
Holy Mother of God I wailed...
I am pursuing my chinese style of fighting, and today in kung fu, I learned the front roundhouse guitar wail.
And I picked it up quickly.
It can be used in combination with the reverse roundhouse wail, consummating a DOUBLE WAIL.
You read me right... before the year is out, I will be wailing so much, I won't even HAVE to kick people in the face.
But I will fly, and sometimes stab.

Flipped out today, kicked people in face... saw another ninja helped him out.
Fighting all the time.
*barely avoids a shuriken thrown at him from across the room. Flips out and cuts his head off*

For somebody so new at this, and not even using the right style, I'm kicking ass.
9:54 am
[nefariousjareth]
while my guitar sweetly wails.
i woke up this morning feeling a bit down. i was having this totally sweet dream where all these hot babes were watching me wail on this guitar (awesome) and i was wailing so hard everything totally started to shake (but in a sweet way) and then i start to wail even harder (i don't know how i managed to) and then suddenly the building falls down around me and i'm standing there wailing and i realize all the babes have been crushed. and then aj's waking me up telling me i'm late for work.

work is LAME. i tried to tell him ninjas do not work, but i was so groggy he just kinda shoved me out the door and i forgot about it until i got here. i want to flip out, but i'm feeling too down.

it gets tiring, flipping out all the time, chopping off heads. i act like that's all i want out of life, but a life of blood and crap-filled pants may not be what i want. i feel alienated from the people i care about - constantly kicking them all right in the face doesn't help. maybe i should spend more time flying or stabbing. something just to break up the head-chopping routine.

oh yeah! many thanks go out to Xxsometimes_i_cryxX. i LOVE my new argyle ninja outfit. thank you so much, honey! <3 <3 <3!!!!!!

i just wish i didn't have to flip out and chop off heads to really feel alive.

Current Mood: okay
Thursday, March 21st, 2002
11:11 pm
[hipgunslinger]
A terrible confession...
I shouldn't even be in this community everyone.

Anybody who's anybody knows that the ninja style of flipping out and chopping off heads is based in a Japanese style of ninjitsu. It operates on the basic principle that it is best to eliminate your opponent by flipping out, chopping off heads, and hopefully ending with crap in someone's pants.

Now comes the confession...

I AM STUDYING A CHINESE STYLE OF FIGHTING!!!


I have tried to keep it secret for some time, by constantly mentioning the words "Kung Fu" and "shaolin" only twenty times a day, but it seems like I cannot keep the facade up anymore.
I'm sorry, but I'm not really a ninja. I just play one on tv.
11:38 pm
[jhen]
How did you know I was ninja-style?
I never told anyone before.
12:05 pm
[hipgunslinger]
What the hell?
When did I even JOIN this community?

If I don't get some answers soon, I think I may just have to flip out from nowhere and start chopping some heads off.
You know, be like water.
12:02 pm
[soyamada]
R.U.P.
I don't know what is really going on with me.

Last night when I was flipping out and chopping off heads...I crapped myself.

I have never actually crapped myself when I was flipping out and chopping off heads.

I am supposed to be a super-slick and cool ninja, and that's hard to be when you have crap in your pants.

Has this happened to anyone else?
Am I still a ninja if i crap my pants when I am flipping out and chopping off heads?

Current Mood: contemplative
10:11 am
[nefariousjareth]
had a pretty good day yesterday. nothing worth crapping my pants over. i probably could have flipped out more, but for some reason my heart wasn't in it.

i'm sad that it seems like people only hang out with me cause i'm a ninja. i mean, of course they would want to - i'm totally awesome and sweet. but i can't help but wonder if people really like me for me, or just cause i'm a ninja. i feel underappreciated.

my friends will get into trouble, like some dude will be totally pushing them around or something. so i'll flip out and totally uppercut the guy in the nuts. so he explodes (it's awesome) and my friend is just like "thanks." no hug or anything. no one really considers my feelings. i didn't have to uppercut that guy in the nuts - i could have just stood there.

on the plus side, i got a totally sweet ninja cardigan. it's so awesome i almost kicked my mom right in the face.

i'll try to have a more awesome day today.

Current Mood: okay
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